Who has done it again!?

ME!! I am proud to announce that I got a 99% on my American History Mid-term! I feel so good about myself right now. That is the second mid-term that I have gotten an A on this semester:) After last year I have some people who like to tease me about being stupid, but when stuff happens like this I just LOVE to shove it in their faces and prove to them that I DO INDEED have a brain:) So I guess thats all for now. AHHHHH! XOXO

So Stressed

I met with an advisor today, and although it made me feel more informed and a little better, it also made me feel 10 times more stressed. Ideally, I should get straight A's so that my GPA jumps up to almost 2.5, but I only have to get one B and three C's. But obviously just getting that would not help my situation. But anyways, I talked to my advisor about going into pre-education and she said I definately should go for it, but that I have to wait till next semester, so for the time being I need to register for courses that work with education, but I don't actually be in the major to take. BUT that is going to be very difficult because my priority registration is with the freshmen so most of the classes I need are going to be filled. Sucky huh? No matter what I do I am getting the short end of the stick, but then again, it is my fault that I am in this situation. But there you go, this is why I am stressed. I have to do so good in my classes, which I am doing good in right now... but Mythology is causing me a lot of trouble and I am just worried that I will end up doing bad in that class. But I mean as long as I get the minimum of one B and don't get anything below a C then at least I won't be kicked out of the university, which is good right? It just might mean that I am postponed another year on entering the education program, therefore leaving me with a total of 6 years at the UA. Wow, I just really hope I am not in college for the rest of my life. It seems like it is so easy for some people, freaks!! XOXO

On a Saturday

There is nothing to do! And the weather sucks again so I can't just hang out outside because it is too hot. There is a football game tonight, but I can't decide whether I want to go or not. I mean, it would be something to do, but I don't really enjoy the games that much, especially when it it hot. My roommates think I am a party-pooper for not going, but whatever:) I think maybe I will go see a movie or something, by myself... I know, lame, but I don't really mind:) I wish San Diego was closer cause I would just drive home for the weekend, spend some time with the fam, instead of spending the weekend alone... like every other day! But good new... Lacrosse starts on Monday!!! YAY! I am so excited, I miss my teammates. And now I will actually have something to do with my days, haha. I can't wait! XOXO

Job hunting and other fun things

Or really, not fun at all! So this is what is going on in the life of Brooke right now: I am in the process of switching majors, so I am meeting with my advisor monday to talk about my academic contract, but thats just my Uni College advisor not the pre-education advisor so that sucks. Once priority registration is over then I can meet with an advisor in the College of Education to discuss what I need to do and what classes I need to take for pre-education. What I know so far is that I have to take math again (eww), I have to take 4, yes 4, semesters of Spanish (omg please kill me), and I have to have 120 hours working experience with children. This is just some of the basics before I actually apply for the C of E. The thing that sucks though is that I am pretty behind since I am switching majors, and all of the chemistry that I took that caused me immense stress last year is now worth nothing WHAT!? But hopefully with some extra summer classes I will be able to catch up some what. 

As for the job hunting thing, I have been looking all day for jobs in which I would be working with elementary age children, so that I can use it as hours of experience, but I am having some trouble. I have limited time to work because of class and lacrosse so that makes it hard to find job because I can't work all day. There is some volunteer things that I can do like work at the child care center at TMC or volunteer at an elementary school, which are both great, it's just that I could really use the money and I wouldn't be getting paid:( 

If anyone has any advice or ideas for me I would really appreciate your input, so please feel free to let me know. Thanks:) XOXO

Losing Weight

It seems impossible. I hate when I see a girl that is just so skinny, or actually not even really skinny, but thin/a reasonable weight, and I know that that girl doesn't do squat to make herself look that way, she just IS the way she is, she eats whatever she wants, hasn't exercised a day in her life. And every time I see some one like that I just want to scream at her and say do you realize how lucky you are!? Do you realize how hard some people work to look like you!? Do you realize how some people will never look like you!? And I know it is silly, because everyone has a different body style and obviously we don't get to pick our body style (or else everyone would look like Brad Pitt and Heidi Klum, ya know...)  but I can't help but get frustrated, because I have been an athlete for years, I have run miles upon miles, lifted weight after weight, and still I don't think I will ever look the way I want to. I even eat pretty healthy! I don't eat fast food! I rarely drink soda! My diet mainly consists of chicken, brown rice, veggies, and coffee... which I think is pretty good compared to the crap that most people eat. UHHHH I just want to be thin, or at least be a size that I am comfortable. And it is not like I am fat. I just don't feel good the way I am now. I complain about my butt and thighs mostly and people say "Oh that's just you though, you have always had a big booty and thunder thighs and probably always will. You run so it's okay, as long as you are in shape what does it matter, blah blah blah." Well, NO. NO NO NO. It is not okay!It does matter... to me. I don't want to just feel/be in shape, I want to look in shape. Is it really something I can't change? I am sick of having to buy a size 31 jeans and then get them hemmed because the size 31 jeans are really made for people that are 6 feet tall, not for a 5'4" girl with short little legs. I don't like having to do the pants dance and jiggy my way into jeans, then do lunges around my room so that they are not so tight that my eye balls are gonna pop out! OH, hey Brooke...why don't you just buy pants that fit you, ya know...the right size??? UM yeah... like I buy tight pants on purpose!!! You see, the bigger the size, the higher the waist, the longer the length. If I got pants any bigger than I already do they would be 3 feet too long and the zipper would come up to my belly button. Sexy huh? Anyways, I just hope that someday I can fit into a pair of jeans and feel good in them. It bothers me that I am saying all of this because I really don't think it is healthy when people are so concerned about the way they look. But it's not all about looking good to me...I want to feel good. Because if I feel good, then I will be happier, then maybe things will go better, and I will be motivated to continue to look good and feel good and be happy. It is a whole circle I guess. Well, I am done rambling about my insecurities. Thanks for putting up with it:) XOXO. 

What did I tell you?

I believe it was that I was going to make 3 miles by the end of the week, and oh yes yes uhhh yes... I DID!:) So I feel pretty good about myself right about now:) PLUS I did some lovely sprints on top of the 3 miles. XOXO.

P.S. I got an "A" on my geology midterm!!!!! What a great week!

Twilight!

As most of you know I am a really big Twilight saga fan, and the movie is coming out in November...well, they just released the new and longer trailer and it is amazing! I am so excited. I will post the link incase any of you would like to look at it yourselves:) XOXO

Okay, I can't copy the link on here... but just go to perezhilton.com and you will find it.

7:41

So this is what I am talking about... I am sitting here in the morning, drinking my coffee with the door open, feeling the lovely cool morning air, BUT am I going to be able to even step outside later????? UH NOOO, cause it is going to be a million more degrees. Stupid weather plays tricks on me.

October!!

I am so happy that it is October! I love October!! October means that it is finally fall (even thought it still doesn't feel like fall), and I love love love fall. I can't wait until I can wear my jeans and a jacket and a little scarf to classes!! It actually kind of cooled off this past weekend, but it is hot again. Boo. But yeah, this last weekend was FAMILY WEEKEND!! So, my mama and dad and sisters drove all the way out here to see me:) They got here friday night and we went to dinner, then Bentley and Taylor spent the night at my apartment. Saturday we had breakfast at my place, then went to a bbq and the football game. And Sunday morning they left after they got their car washed by the lacrosse team:) It was so good to see them, I had so much fun, although I can say on behalf of all of us... it was a little stressful. I was sad to say bye to them though. Anyways, I am finally getting my butt back into shape. I started running at the Pima CC track that is right down the street from me, and I have been making my workouts increasingly harder/longer. Last week I started out with a mile and core and that was surprisingly difficult, but just today I ran 2 1/4 miles straight without stopping and did core, arms, and legs and felt really good. It doesn't sound like much, but when you haven't been working out regularly for a while I guess it kind of is. I think by the end of the week I will be onto 3 miles though:) I love the time of day when I run... I go around 6 when the sun is almost all the way down behind the mountains, and they are sillouhetted and the sky is bright orange right over them and then as you look higher it turns into a dark blue, then right above you you can see the moon and stars are starting to show... not to mention its about 10 degrees cooler. Haha. Well, I guess I should go study. I have a quiz on Friday, a paper due Monday, and a history midterm that is on Tuesday AND Thursday. Oh joy!!! XOXO.

Busy...

Sorry it has been a while since I have written anything. It has been a busy and stressful couple of weeks. Last week a had a couple of quizzes, and today I had a music presentation and a geology mid-term (which I think went pretty well:)) So, needless to say, I have had a lot on my plate. I also finally started working out again which feels great. Lacrosse practice officially starts in a month so I have to be ready. But I know no matter how hard I work before it starts I am still going to die when we do conditioning!! 

My best friend Danika came out to Tucson this last weekend for soccer, she plays for UCSB, so I got to see her, and that was awesome. It had been about 2 months since I had seen her so it was about time we got to hang out:) We only got to have lunch and hang out for a little, but at least we got to see each other. And now this weekend my family is coming out for family weekend!!! I can't wait!!!!!!:)

It has been kind of lonely for a while now. Both my roommates work after class and dont come home till about 6 or 7 so when I am done with class and come home I come to an empty apartment and it stays that way all day. I like to be around people, so that doesn't work so good for me. But once lacrosse starts I will be gone most of the day also, so it's only a couple more weeks of being lonely I suppose.

Well, I guess I don't have much else to say.

I am just stressed as usual.

Actually, recently I have been unreasonably mad about everything. I have a really short fuse and anything and everything will set me off. I think I need to find a good way to release it instead of keep it in and blow up at the end of the week. Sometime I think about going to talk to someone again... but I don't know. Hopefully this gets better.

XOXO