Solo Adventures

So I am finally home for winter break!! I left Tucson this morning at 6:30 and got here about 12:30. That 6 hour drive was the most terrifying drive ever!!! It pored down rain the entire time, and at one point when I was about an hour from home, passing though the mountains, it SNOWED!!! I was seriously driving in a snow storm!! At first it was just kinda white like it had previously snowed, then after a little while it was full blown SNOWING! The roads were icy and everything around me was WHITE!! It was the coolest/scariest thing ever! I wish I could have gotten out of the car and touched it. But because of the snow it took me longer to get home. Oh, well. Now I am home and happy and ready for break!!! XOXO

Mama and Ashley

I am so dreadfully sorry that I have not been keeping you two updated! How rude of me!! Hahaha. So here you go, this is what I have been up to the last week...

My finals officially started on Friday, although I did have one on Wednesday. I think I did good on my Geology final, but not so good on the listening portion of my Music final. Today I have a Mythology final which should kick my ass pretty hard, and tomorrow I have a American History final which I should do good on. I also have to take the second part of my Music final on the internet, but apparently it is not working the way it is suppose to, so I am still not able to take that, and I don't know when I will. But it is going to be one of my hardest finals. I have an hour to answer 100 questions... JEEZ! I have two hours to do a lot less than that in all my other classes, so yeah, I don't know, should be interesting. I have recently become obsessed with the show called HOUSE. I watched the marathon yesterday while I studied. Ummmm... I really have not been doing anything but studying and just sitting around. I am in the process of ordering apparel for my lacrosse team, and that is the most stressful thing ever!!! I also have to go get my oil changed, tires filled up, clean my room, house, kitchen, laundry, everything, before I leave for home. I am leaving early Wednesday morning to go back to San Diego!!! Yay, I am sooo excited!! Then what, like a week till Christmas!?! WOOO! Okay, well I have to finish getting ready to go to my final. Love love love! XOXO

It's been a while!

Sorry I haven't posted for a while, it's been busy busy busy around here!!! So this is my last week of regular classes, then I have Dead Day Thursday and my finals start Friday, then I come home Wednesday!!! YAY! I have been pretty busy catching up with class work and projects and attempting to study for my finals. Plus, I am trying to order a bunch of stuff for my team so thats been stressful. We had a scrimmage on Friday against ASU, we lost but I had a lot of fun. It was the first time we played as a team, so it was like a trial run/ warm up for us. I feel like I played pretty good though!! I scored 2 goals:) One of them I ran the ball from the far restraining line to the goal, it felt SO good to run that fast again. I feel like I have gotten so much slower, so I intend to work my butt off to get back to being super fast again! I am feeling really behind on school stuff lately, and it is making me stress out really bad. Luckily I have some pretty nice professors that are being really understanding and lenient. I am so grateful for that. I have been having the hardest time sleeping though. It takes me about 2 hours to fall asleep, then I wake up every couple of hours and have to shift in my bed. I guess I just have a lot on my mind. Actually, I don't guess, I know. I have A LOT on my mind. I think about Niamh all the time. I couldn't even really tell you what it is I am thinking about her, it is just that she is always on my mind. It is weird because I like talk to her in my head. I figure she might be able to hear me. But then I think stuff that I don't want to tell her, then I am like OH CRAP, pretend you didn't hear that Niamh, and I always say sorry to her haha. I really wish I could talk to her for real. I miss her a lot. I don't know how to explain how I feel, but I guess you could compare it to like a druggy needing their fix... maybe not that crazy, but I have this overwhelming NEED for her. I have been so angry lately because of it. Its like I am not getting what I want, so I am taking out on everyone else, I feel so bad for my roommates, I wouldn't want to be around me. And it's not just that I am angry because I am not getting what I want, to talk to her, I am angry at myself, like there was some way I could have prevented this, even though I know that that doesn't matter, and I shouldn't be thinking that way. It is going to be weird not coming home to her this break. I actually don't even know what I am going to do. I have a lot of great friends, and I am sure I will see them all over break, but normally I would spend like every day with Niamh. So who am I going to hang out with? It makes me so sad. I just want her back. This isn't fair. Why did someone as good as Niamh have to die so young, when there are murderers and criminals out there that deserve to die but will probably live forever? Life just isn't fair, and I know that. But I can't help but think it.

Thanksgiving!

So, Thanksgiving was amazing:) Of course. The Riggs came down, and Randi brought Steve, and Gramma and Poppy came too. And basically the day consisted of eating, eating, and more eating. But we did have a pretty fun treasure hunt this year, except for the fact that we missed out on a chance of 100 dollars each!!! Yeah, we got SQUAT! NOTHING! NADA! AHHHHH! But it was fun, we had to sing a couple times, and Steve had to do all kinds of stuff, haha. Poor guy:) At the end of the day I walked down to my neighbor/friend Steve's house and hung out with him for the rest of the night. We looked through old messages and comments to and from Niamh, and it was actually really fun to do. I would not have been able to do it by myself because I probably would have just cried and then had to stop, but having Steve there, doing the same thing, made it fun. It is nice to remember the funny memories, and see the old nick-names we used to call each other. I had totally forgotten about some of the stuff I read. 

And then yesterday, Me, Bent, Danika, Brit, and Kalani went to PB and OB. We spent all day down by the beach and it was so great. I miss the water. We spent a lot of time under the crystal pier looking at sea critters, the water was SO cold, but SO nice. And of course, ended the day stuffing ourselves with left-overs. 

I am gonna put some pictures up, because heaven forbid Ashley have to wait any longer to see them;) Haha, I am just kidding Ash, I LOVE YOU:)

Home

I am flying home AGAIN tonight, for Thanksgiving. Even though I was just there, I am happy to go back. :)

Niamh Mary Pownall

Seriously, the most beautiful girl in the world.

Life is funny like that...

As you all know, my very close friend Niamh was in a car accident at 3 am this last Sunday, and did not make it. I flew home on Tuesday so that I could be here for her family. Last night I went to the rosary/visitation and saw her parents, and today I went to her funeral. I got to walk down and lead her casket along with some of her other close friends and place a flower in this thing. Today was by far, the hardest day that I have ever had to live through. There are not words to describe the pain that fills up my heart right now. For her, for her family, for her brother, for her friends. It was so good to see that so many people came to support and remember her today. Old friends, old soccer coaches, old class mates. Even her family from Ireland flew in. She was so so loved, and that really showed today. After the funeral we went her burial at Singing Hills, which is absolutely beautiful, her parents could not have picked a more perfect place to lay her to rest. And here is where we get to the part about life being funny... I got in a car accident on the freeway on my way over to the burial. Ironic? It was actually a 9 car pile up, which my parents and sisters were also in, but I was not in the same car as them. But the good news is that no one was hurt. And I am sure Niamh was looking down on us and just laughing her ass off;) Anyways, we got the burial a little bit late, but in time enough so that I could say my farewells and talk to her family. Every time I saw her Dad it just broke my heart. You see, Niamh's Dad is like my second Dad. He took me on trips with them, and has always just treated me like I was a part of the family. He even calls me his surrogate daughter:) I love her family from the bottom of my heart, and even with Niamh gone will still see them as often as I can. I promised. I was also actually forced by her Dad to promise that I will not knock on the door when I come over, that I will just walk in. I believe his exact words were: " I swear Brooke, if you knock on the door I will kick your ass!" And he is a large Irish man , so I don't think I really want to take any chances there;) After the burial Mom, Dad, and I went to a smaller little gathering for close family and friends and it was really nice to just visit with people. I sat with my good friend/neighbor Steve and we just talked forever about Niamh, and funny things she did, and silly stories, and just everything. It was good to be able to laugh after a whole day of crying. All in all, today was a sad day, and a day I will never ever ever forget. I will miss my friend more than anything in the world and no one will ever replace her. I can't believe that she is really gone. Who is gonna jean shop with me now!?! I love her with every inch of my body, and she will always be on my mind and in my heart. Rest peacefully Niamh.

R.I.P Niamh Pownall

I just got news from my Mom that my best friend Niamh from high school passed away last night due to a car accident. There were 3 other people in the car, and she was the only one that died. I can't believe this. It doesn't seem real. You never think that something like this is going to happen to you. This is the worst feeling in the world. I love you Niamh! I will never forget you!

Lake

Here are some pictures from the lake:)

OH!

I forgot! We also went to the Desert Museum last weekend! It was awesome... the picture in the heading is from there. It was beautiful!

Just a little update!

I am sure you are all so very eager to know what has been going on in my life since I haven't written in a while! Hahaha. Well here you go! Last weekend my roommates and I hosted a "Obamarama" party in celebration of Obama being elected, it was so much fun! Then I had an Alumni game Saturday that I actually missed because I was registering for classes, but I made it to the BBQ afterwards and that was fun. This week nothing really happened. There was no class on Tuesday due to Veterans Day so Kristin, Yael, Jessica, and I went to Silverbell Lake and had a picnic!! It was so so so much fun! We made deviled eggs and sandwitched, and then brought a bunch of other picnic food and ate it by the lake, then played around in the grass and fed the ducks:) The rest of the week I did nothing. I only had lacrosse one day this week, so I was just a lazy bum the rest of the days. Yesterday I went and had shirts made for my teams ASU scrimmage in December, then went straight to an advisor meeting. According to my advisor I am right on track and should for sure be off of probation at the end of the semester!!! YAY! This weekend I have A LOT to do. I have to study for a geo exam on monday, a music quiz on monday, and write a paper for mythology due monday. WOW. And I also have a car wash on sunday and I have to go to some stupid concert for music and then write a paper about it. BOO. That's just a tad bit overwhelming!!!! Anyways, I don't have much else to say. I am so happy for Ash and Matt, I can't wait to see baby Paiton! I think that this new addition to our family is a good reason for us all to come together and have a little celebration! A family reunion if you will. We could all go to Idaho, or meet somewhere in the middle, I don't care, but we have not ALL been together for a very long time. SO, I say... once Brandon is back from his thing and we are all within the continental U.S. we need to have a family reunion. What do you guys think!?!? Don't be lame, I know you want to too! :) And here is a little poem that my Dad write for me... he would like to think that he is a published writer so I am going to put it up for you guys to enjoy:) Can you see where I get this great talent from? HAHAHA.

You are super

You are strong

You smell pretty

You smell wrong

You work hard

And it shows

You've changed that

But not your nose

Miss you greatly

Sometimes not

See you soon

To eat a lot

You have some serious skills Dad:)

Congrats Ashley and Matt!

Baby P is finally here!!! I am so happy for you guys (and just a tad bit jealous;)), you guys are gonna be awesome parents! I can't wait to meet the little beauty:)

Prop 8

I could not be more disappointed in California right now. We have come such a long way, and passing Prop 8 to ban gay marriage is a huge step back. Although this proposition does not effect me personally, I am so sad to see it pass. What happened to equal rights? Who cares if you are gay, straight, bi, black, white, asian, latino... we are all the same!! We should not be discriminating against anyone! ANYONE! I mean look, our next president is a black man!! That is so great! I would just hope that since we have come this far to see each other as equals, no matter our skin color or gender, that we could also see each other as equals, no matter our sexual preference. I don't understand why people who are not gay care so much about the actions of gay people. Some people believe that being gay is a sin... well, what do you care if someone else sins? ( Not that I believe it is a sin) It is not your life! It does not effect you! This is just so sad, and I don't understand.

Obama!!!

I am excited to say that I voted in my first election! And I am so happy that Obama is going to be our next president:)

Yes, I realize that it is 2 am...

... someone hit my car (while parked) and scratched the crap out of the back of it:( I am really upset, this is the second time this has happened and now I have 2 big scratches, one on each side of the back bumper... my poor car:( People are such idiots! My car is tiny, how could you possibly hit it while it is just chillin in a parking space in front of my apartment? 

Happy Halloween!!

YAY! October is finally over! Finally November, and Thanksgiving in San Diego, and Twilight premiere, and then Christmas!!!!! But before all of that fun stuff, there's Halloween:) 

Just not my day!

I am on crack or something today cause I am just all disoriented?? To start off, very very late last night, or you could say very very early this morning, I was woken up by boys shouting the song "Will You Be My Girl" outside of my window, and I thought it was a dream when I woke up this morning, but my roommates heard it too? Freaky. Then this morning I was making tea and I thought I the water in the microwave and then heard it beep and took it out, but apparently it was my roommates, not mine? That was confusing. Then when me and Yael were walking out to my car to go to class I walked to the passenger side of the car and did not even think it was weird until Yael laughed at me and asked what I was doing. Then when we got to campus and were in the parking garage, I dropped my favorite Starbucks mug and it totally broke in half:( This is a very weird/not good day. AND on top of all this other crap, Blockbuster screwed me over and charged me for a movie that I DID turn in and that made me over draw my account and now I am being charged an overdraft fee and I have NO MONEY! OH BOY are they gonna get a piece of my mind later today! 

But other than all that stuff, things are good:) Lacrosse is going great, I am so happy to be playing again! The weather has been pretty good, at least better than San Diego, or so I have heard. And I am doing well in my classes:) So, I guess I don't have much to complain about. Right now I am sitting at the big fountain by Old Main in the shade  and it is very lovely. And now I am going to take a nap:) Love you all. XOXO

Homecoming, football, and HSM3!

This weekend was very busy! It was Homecoming weekend, so there were lots of festivities plus the game against USC. So Saturday night was the game, but we got to campus early to walk around the mall with all the tailgaters and alumni. After we walked around for like an hour we decided to go to the stadium to try to get good seats, which we did:) We got there really early so we had to sit around for about 2 hours waiting for the game to start. It was a close game and it was SO frustrating to watch! I am just gonna put it out there... I hate USC and everything about it. They had a lot of fans there for the game and they were just really cocky and disrespectful. And their band came too, they are the only team to bring their band to away games, and they played after every play and it was very obnoxious! Anyways, we got home around 11 from the game and Kristin and I stayed up really late watching scary movies:) Then this morning me, Kristin, Yael, and Jessica went to the NICU (neonatal intensive care unit) at UMC and took a tour and learned about what they do for the babies, and we got to see the little premie babies and they were so cute. There was a Dad there feeding his baby right when we got there and it was really sweet. I always said I wanted to be a neonatologist and work with babies, but when I actually got to college and advisors told me the probability of getting into med school I got really discouraged... but going in there today and seeing the NICU first hand made me realize that that really is my dream job, it is sad that I probably won't be doing it though. Maybe I will go back to school later in my life and pursue being a neonatal nurse. One of my friends even said she could really see me being a neonatal nurse:) I just LOVE babies!! Haha. Anywaysssss... after that we went to the movies and saw High School Musical 3!! It was so good! And Zac Efron is unbelievably beautiful, I just love him!:) After the movie we got lunch then headed home. I haven't been feeling good all weekend so when we got home I got in bed and fell asleep immediately and didn't wake up for 4 HOURS!!!! WOW! Apparently I was tired...well I guess it makes sense sense since I only got 4 hours of sleep the night before. And now I am watching scary movies again, I am on the third one...first it was Cabin Fever, then Jeepers Creepers II, and now The Pumpkin Carver(?)... and last night I watched Halloween, Halloween 4, and Pet Sematary. I think I have had my fill of horror films now because I am starting to get really jumpy. Haha. XOXO

Tucson

I could die of boredom. 

Who has done it again!?

ME!! I am proud to announce that I got a 99% on my American History Mid-term! I feel so good about myself right now. That is the second mid-term that I have gotten an A on this semester:) After last year I have some people who like to tease me about being stupid, but when stuff happens like this I just LOVE to shove it in their faces and prove to them that I DO INDEED have a brain:) So I guess thats all for now. AHHHHH! XOXO

So Stressed

I met with an advisor today, and although it made me feel more informed and a little better, it also made me feel 10 times more stressed. Ideally, I should get straight A's so that my GPA jumps up to almost 2.5, but I only have to get one B and three C's. But obviously just getting that would not help my situation. But anyways, I talked to my advisor about going into pre-education and she said I definately should go for it, but that I have to wait till next semester, so for the time being I need to register for courses that work with education, but I don't actually be in the major to take. BUT that is going to be very difficult because my priority registration is with the freshmen so most of the classes I need are going to be filled. Sucky huh? No matter what I do I am getting the short end of the stick, but then again, it is my fault that I am in this situation. But there you go, this is why I am stressed. I have to do so good in my classes, which I am doing good in right now... but Mythology is causing me a lot of trouble and I am just worried that I will end up doing bad in that class. But I mean as long as I get the minimum of one B and don't get anything below a C then at least I won't be kicked out of the university, which is good right? It just might mean that I am postponed another year on entering the education program, therefore leaving me with a total of 6 years at the UA. Wow, I just really hope I am not in college for the rest of my life. It seems like it is so easy for some people, freaks!! XOXO

On a Saturday

There is nothing to do! And the weather sucks again so I can't just hang out outside because it is too hot. There is a football game tonight, but I can't decide whether I want to go or not. I mean, it would be something to do, but I don't really enjoy the games that much, especially when it it hot. My roommates think I am a party-pooper for not going, but whatever:) I think maybe I will go see a movie or something, by myself... I know, lame, but I don't really mind:) I wish San Diego was closer cause I would just drive home for the weekend, spend some time with the fam, instead of spending the weekend alone... like every other day! But good new... Lacrosse starts on Monday!!! YAY! I am so excited, I miss my teammates. And now I will actually have something to do with my days, haha. I can't wait! XOXO

Job hunting and other fun things

Or really, not fun at all! So this is what is going on in the life of Brooke right now: I am in the process of switching majors, so I am meeting with my advisor monday to talk about my academic contract, but thats just my Uni College advisor not the pre-education advisor so that sucks. Once priority registration is over then I can meet with an advisor in the College of Education to discuss what I need to do and what classes I need to take for pre-education. What I know so far is that I have to take math again (eww), I have to take 4, yes 4, semesters of Spanish (omg please kill me), and I have to have 120 hours working experience with children. This is just some of the basics before I actually apply for the C of E. The thing that sucks though is that I am pretty behind since I am switching majors, and all of the chemistry that I took that caused me immense stress last year is now worth nothing WHAT!? But hopefully with some extra summer classes I will be able to catch up some what. 

As for the job hunting thing, I have been looking all day for jobs in which I would be working with elementary age children, so that I can use it as hours of experience, but I am having some trouble. I have limited time to work because of class and lacrosse so that makes it hard to find job because I can't work all day. There is some volunteer things that I can do like work at the child care center at TMC or volunteer at an elementary school, which are both great, it's just that I could really use the money and I wouldn't be getting paid:( 

If anyone has any advice or ideas for me I would really appreciate your input, so please feel free to let me know. Thanks:) XOXO

Losing Weight

It seems impossible. I hate when I see a girl that is just so skinny, or actually not even really skinny, but thin/a reasonable weight, and I know that that girl doesn't do squat to make herself look that way, she just IS the way she is, she eats whatever she wants, hasn't exercised a day in her life. And every time I see some one like that I just want to scream at her and say do you realize how lucky you are!? Do you realize how hard some people work to look like you!? Do you realize how some people will never look like you!? And I know it is silly, because everyone has a different body style and obviously we don't get to pick our body style (or else everyone would look like Brad Pitt and Heidi Klum, ya know...)  but I can't help but get frustrated, because I have been an athlete for years, I have run miles upon miles, lifted weight after weight, and still I don't think I will ever look the way I want to. I even eat pretty healthy! I don't eat fast food! I rarely drink soda! My diet mainly consists of chicken, brown rice, veggies, and coffee... which I think is pretty good compared to the crap that most people eat. UHHHH I just want to be thin, or at least be a size that I am comfortable. And it is not like I am fat. I just don't feel good the way I am now. I complain about my butt and thighs mostly and people say "Oh that's just you though, you have always had a big booty and thunder thighs and probably always will. You run so it's okay, as long as you are in shape what does it matter, blah blah blah." Well, NO. NO NO NO. It is not okay!It does matter... to me. I don't want to just feel/be in shape, I want to look in shape. Is it really something I can't change? I am sick of having to buy a size 31 jeans and then get them hemmed because the size 31 jeans are really made for people that are 6 feet tall, not for a 5'4" girl with short little legs. I don't like having to do the pants dance and jiggy my way into jeans, then do lunges around my room so that they are not so tight that my eye balls are gonna pop out! OH, hey Brooke...why don't you just buy pants that fit you, ya know...the right size??? UM yeah... like I buy tight pants on purpose!!! You see, the bigger the size, the higher the waist, the longer the length. If I got pants any bigger than I already do they would be 3 feet too long and the zipper would come up to my belly button. Sexy huh? Anyways, I just hope that someday I can fit into a pair of jeans and feel good in them. It bothers me that I am saying all of this because I really don't think it is healthy when people are so concerned about the way they look. But it's not all about looking good to me...I want to feel good. Because if I feel good, then I will be happier, then maybe things will go better, and I will be motivated to continue to look good and feel good and be happy. It is a whole circle I guess. Well, I am done rambling about my insecurities. Thanks for putting up with it:) XOXO. 

What did I tell you?

I believe it was that I was going to make 3 miles by the end of the week, and oh yes yes uhhh yes... I DID!:) So I feel pretty good about myself right about now:) PLUS I did some lovely sprints on top of the 3 miles. XOXO.

P.S. I got an "A" on my geology midterm!!!!! What a great week!

Twilight!

As most of you know I am a really big Twilight saga fan, and the movie is coming out in November...well, they just released the new and longer trailer and it is amazing! I am so excited. I will post the link incase any of you would like to look at it yourselves:) XOXO

Okay, I can't copy the link on here... but just go to perezhilton.com and you will find it.

7:41

So this is what I am talking about... I am sitting here in the morning, drinking my coffee with the door open, feeling the lovely cool morning air, BUT am I going to be able to even step outside later????? UH NOOO, cause it is going to be a million more degrees. Stupid weather plays tricks on me.

October!!

I am so happy that it is October! I love October!! October means that it is finally fall (even thought it still doesn't feel like fall), and I love love love fall. I can't wait until I can wear my jeans and a jacket and a little scarf to classes!! It actually kind of cooled off this past weekend, but it is hot again. Boo. But yeah, this last weekend was FAMILY WEEKEND!! So, my mama and dad and sisters drove all the way out here to see me:) They got here friday night and we went to dinner, then Bentley and Taylor spent the night at my apartment. Saturday we had breakfast at my place, then went to a bbq and the football game. And Sunday morning they left after they got their car washed by the lacrosse team:) It was so good to see them, I had so much fun, although I can say on behalf of all of us... it was a little stressful. I was sad to say bye to them though. Anyways, I am finally getting my butt back into shape. I started running at the Pima CC track that is right down the street from me, and I have been making my workouts increasingly harder/longer. Last week I started out with a mile and core and that was surprisingly difficult, but just today I ran 2 1/4 miles straight without stopping and did core, arms, and legs and felt really good. It doesn't sound like much, but when you haven't been working out regularly for a while I guess it kind of is. I think by the end of the week I will be onto 3 miles though:) I love the time of day when I run... I go around 6 when the sun is almost all the way down behind the mountains, and they are sillouhetted and the sky is bright orange right over them and then as you look higher it turns into a dark blue, then right above you you can see the moon and stars are starting to show... not to mention its about 10 degrees cooler. Haha. Well, I guess I should go study. I have a quiz on Friday, a paper due Monday, and a history midterm that is on Tuesday AND Thursday. Oh joy!!! XOXO.

Busy...

Sorry it has been a while since I have written anything. It has been a busy and stressful couple of weeks. Last week a had a couple of quizzes, and today I had a music presentation and a geology mid-term (which I think went pretty well:)) So, needless to say, I have had a lot on my plate. I also finally started working out again which feels great. Lacrosse practice officially starts in a month so I have to be ready. But I know no matter how hard I work before it starts I am still going to die when we do conditioning!! 

My best friend Danika came out to Tucson this last weekend for soccer, she plays for UCSB, so I got to see her, and that was awesome. It had been about 2 months since I had seen her so it was about time we got to hang out:) We only got to have lunch and hang out for a little, but at least we got to see each other. And now this weekend my family is coming out for family weekend!!! I can't wait!!!!!!:)

It has been kind of lonely for a while now. Both my roommates work after class and dont come home till about 6 or 7 so when I am done with class and come home I come to an empty apartment and it stays that way all day. I like to be around people, so that doesn't work so good for me. But once lacrosse starts I will be gone most of the day also, so it's only a couple more weeks of being lonely I suppose.

Well, I guess I don't have much else to say.

I am just stressed as usual.

Actually, recently I have been unreasonably mad about everything. I have a really short fuse and anything and everything will set me off. I think I need to find a good way to release it instead of keep it in and blow up at the end of the week. Sometime I think about going to talk to someone again... but I don't know. Hopefully this gets better.

XOXO

This is what I do in class...

To make time go faster in my amazingly boring Mythology class I amuse myself by writing little poems and what not. Some of them turn out pretty funny, and this one in particular made one of my roommates laugh out loud, so I thought I would share it with you guys. I know I can always use a good laugh:)

Sittin' in my class

Feelin' pretty bored

Learnin' about the Gods

Hercules and more

Professor is a monotone

Seats are really close

The kid thats sittin' next to me

Is smellin' kind of gross

Heads are bobbing everywhere

People are asleep

I'm gettin' pretty annoyed

With all the phones that beep

Class is not yet over

But people are packin' up

Rustlin' papers all around

Man, this class just SUCKS!!

I know my Dad will be proud:) I get it from him.

And heres another one...

Down is up

And up is down

My whole world is flipped around

Left is right

And right is left

I failed PE, but passed my test?

Squares of five

Rectangles too

Less is more, and more is few

Black is white

And white is cruel

We sit on ground, but stand on stools

Friends are Foes

And smiles are frowns

My whole world is flipped around

Mooshy stuff...

I have the best Mom in the world.

I do.

For no particular reason.

She is just amazing.

On the verge of a mental breakdown...

The stress and work is piling up and I think I am going to go insane.

My classes are not based on a bunch of homework assignments, so homework is not my problem, it is the pressure to take state of the art, descriptive, notes and study them very carefully and remembering every last thing, so that I don't totally screw up the tests, which my whole grade is based upon. Yeah... no pressure. And now that I am almost off academic probation I am going to be needing to decide on major so that I can catch up and take the classes I need to take, BUT that is a really hard decision to make when I don't know what the hell I really want to do with night. I flip from one major to the other every other day, I just can't make up my mind. And the time of day that I always really worry about what I am going to do is right when I turn the lights off to go to bed, so then it takes me at least an hour or two to fall asleep, because I am sick to my stomach with anxiety. It is not so great. So, I try to listen to music to get my mind off of it, but that doesn't help, it just gives me one more thing to put through my brain while I am trying to calm down. It is a ridiculous cycle. I need help!!!

And this probably doesn't make much sense to anyone but me, but the heat here is making me even more stressed. I feel trapped inside my apartment when I am not on campus because it is way too hot to go outside. When I get to my car after walking from class I am drenched with sweat, it is disgusting. And I would LOVE to go on a run outside when I have nothing else to do, but NO, it is too freaking HOT!! I would probably have a heatstroke and die. I feel like I never do anything, because it is just too hot, TOO HOT! So, basically, I am lazy and fat. EW. 

Alaska sounds really nice right now. 

Really

Family...

I flew home to San Diego this weekend to spend time with my family and it was so much fun and so so so good to see them! My Mama and Dad were the only ones that knew I was coming home, so it was a surprise for Bentley and Taylor...and Gramma and Poppy:) We pretty much just hung out all weekend because I just wanted to spend time with them. We ate dinner at Seaport Village Saturday night, and during the day Taylor and I went to the movies and saw The Woman (everyone else was at Bent's soccer game in Temecula). On Sunday we all went to Bent's game then spent the rest of the day together at home. Then my last day, Monday, me and my Mom spent the whole day together, which was amazing, and went shopping and to lunch. It was so much fun, I wish I could just call her up whenever I felt like it and meet her for lunch. That would be so awesome. I flew back to Tucson last night. I am not too sad to leave SD because I know my family is coming to Tucson at the beginning of October so I will see them soon enough, but it is still always sad to say bye to your family, ya know?

XOXO

Exhaustion...

My exhaustion is finally catching up with me. It is so hard to wake up in the morning, and lately I have been feeling like I am getting sick. My head hurts and my throat hurts and I am just SO TIRED. I already wish I had a break from school. 

Taking a break...

Today is a weird day, and I don't know why. Don't you ever just wake up and feel... well, weird... like something is not right?? Maybe you don't, I don't know. But it sucks. ( I just realized that I used the word "don't" 4 times in one sentence, wow). 

I think part of it is that I am feeling really homesick today. I wish I could just drive home in an hour and spend the weekend with my family then drive an hour home, but unfortunately it takes a lot longer than an hour to get home, so I won't be going home any time soon. But good news... I got a package in the mail today!!! It was so exciting, I LOVE getting mail! It was from my Mama and it had all of my favorite things in it:) She is the best!!!

Anyways, I had a bbq with my lacrosse team today. It was so so so much fun to see all of my lax cats again!! They are my Tucson family, and are a big reason that it is bearable for me to be away from my real family for so long. They are my other sisters in a sense:) Some of the new freshman/recruits came to the bbq as well, so that was nice to see who will be joining us.

There is a football game tonight, actually right now, but I decided not to go because I am just too tired. And it is as hot as crap outside and I don't feel like standing outside for 3 hours. No fun! So, I am just chilling by myself at my apartment and watching movies. Very exciting.

XOXO

12:25 am...

This is the time in which my roommates and I were rudely awaken tonight. 

I guess our neighbors, the only ones we have yet to meet, decided to throw a raging party for the whole population of Mexico this lovely Thursday night, or you could say morning, and kind of forgot that they are not the only inhabitants of building 11. They were so loud that I could hear them over my music when it finally woke me up. So, me, Kristin, and Yael decided to check out what was going on, and actually our other neighbors across the hall were doing the same thing as us, and our hall was packed with people just blabbin away in spanish and music was blaring from the apartment, sooooo... the pleasant people we are, we told them to get the hell out of our building or go back inside because unlike them we have CLASS BRIGHT AND EARLY AND ARE TRYING TO SLEEP!!! They didn't really listen to us and we didn't really expect them too. They kind of migrated down towards the parking lot and guess what...THEY GOT REAL COMFY SITTING ON MY CAR!!! ON MY FREAKIN CAR!!! So, now I was really, really pissed off, I grabbed my keys, stormed down to where they were in my pajamas with barefeet, told them to get off my car, and moved it away from them. EW! I could not be more annoyed than I am right now! And NOW I can't sleep. JEEZE!!! UGH! And... now it will be almost impossible for me to wake up for class in the morning. Great. Hope your night was better than mine.

XOXO

24...

... days now, that I have been back in Tucson. It feels like a lot longer. Although this is only the end of my second week of classes I already feel like I have been going forever. So far classes aren't too bad. I actually love my American History class, and my music class is pretty good too. We pretty much just listen to different types of music and talk about the different aspects of it. This week I actually kind of learned how to read music; kind of... I am sure it is a lot more complicated than he made it out to be. I also have a class that confuses the crap out of me!! My Classical Mythology class is obviously a very complicated class, and it is no help that the professor is 500 years old and says "uh" after every 3 words. Needless to say, it makes it EXTREMELY hard to follow.

Fall Lacrosse practice doesn't start up again till october (official practice at least), so I have been doing my own work out routine; usually just running on the streets or track, or something at the rec. But, last night I went to my first spinning class and LOVED it, so I am going to try to go to that every week. It was super hard, but felt SO SO SO good afterwards!!!:)

So, other than school and working out I have not really been dong much. I read a lot, and I also write a lot. My two favorite things to do:) But nothing too exciting.

XOXO 

One more thing...

I vented to all of you about the whole Midnight Sun the other day, and I just wanted to add that I decided to read the first twelve chapter. They were absolutely amazing and I couldn't even tell that they were just a draft. Props to Stephenie Meyer. I know that she is really disappointed about the chapters being leaked but I hope she knows that we all are still DYING to read Midnight Sun and will wait as long as she needs to get back into the mind set to finish it. I know that is extremely nerdy for me to say, but I truly LOVE her writing and can't wait to read more!!! :)

Also, I am posting a picture of myself, my roommate Kristin, and my good friend Jessica at the football game friday. The sky looks BEAUTIFUL. Right before the storm at sunset. Enjoy.

XOXO

Unproductive...

I might just be the laziest person on Earth. Well, at least I feel like that. Ugh. I only had one class today and it was at 11 and I still found it nearly impossible to get out of bed for it. I guess that could be due to the fact that I was up late watching the premieres of all my show, and OF COURSE all my shows are on on the same night. And I have to say, I am a little disappointed in One Tree Hill. I still love the show of course, but the direction they are going with the plot it is not even believable anymore! AH! 

Anyways... so, my alarm first went off at 7 am and I continued to snooze it every 5 minutes until 9 am. Why I didn't just turn it off, I don't know... But during those tiny measures of time I managed to dream very detailed dreams, which was really weird, and when I finally got up at 9 I thought I was at home in San Diego (probably because I was dreaming about home). Needless to say, it was really freaky.

Sorry I don't have much for you today. Nothing very exciting has happened (which is probably a good thing).

XOXO

Midnight Sun...

For those of you who are Twilight geeks like me, I have some really disappointing news about the next book Midnight Sun, which is Edward's perspective... Basically, some idiot leaked the first 12 chapters and Stepeanie is really upset so she has postponed the writing of the rest of it indefinitely. It might not be written at all. I am really upset about this as I am sure you are too, but I can understand where Stephenie is coming from. This is all just really sad:(

Here is a link to her website so that you can read what Stephenie had to say about everything.

http://www.stepheniemeyer.com/midnightsun.html

Exciting stuff...

Sorry, it has been a few days since I have filled you guys in on the exciting events of my life;) But actually, not much has happened. I survived my first week of classes and I am now enjoying my three day weekend (although I would be enjoying it more if my parents would have let me COME HOME). Yesterday was the first home football game of the season. We played the Idaho Vandals and kicked the crap out of them, 70-0. WOW GO WILDCATS!! But let me tell you about that game cause it was quite interesting.... So, we get to the stadium with 90 minutes to game time so we could get decent seats, after a while all of our friends have showed up, along with most of the other ZonaZoo (student section), and everyone is ready for the game and pumped up. Finally it is game time, the band does their thing, the team has their dramatic entrance accompanied by a bunch of fireworks, we all get up shaking our keys for kickoff as it begins to rain, then suddenly...both teams run off of the field back to the locker rooms or wherever they went, I don't exactly know. So, obviously everyone is a little confused, then they announce over the speaker that everyone needs to exit the stadium for their own safety. WHAT!? Lightning. Most people leave, except, of course, the ZonaZoo. So we stood our ground and didn't leave. There was the chanting of a few not so nice cheers, the throwing of a million water bottles onto the field, the arrest of a kid who thought it was a cool idea to run onto the field, and a few more not so nice chants. But after about an hour the game was FINALLY back on, by which time we were all soaked to the core from the crazy rain. It was a good night though:)

XOXO

Trying again...

So, Riki has given me numerous diets to follow, but I always fall of the wagon about a week or two in, so this time I vow to stay ON the wagon until I am happy with the way I look and feel:) It seems like a very doable diet so I think I will be okay! Anyways, it is my third day here at school. So far everything is good. I have the same three classes today that I had on Monday; Music, Mythology, and Geology. But it sucks because I have breaks between all of them, and my apartment is too far away from campus for me to drive home, so I just have to stick around and hang out in lounges and what not. I brought my laptop today... well obviously because I am writing this right now, haha. Bad thing is, it makes my backpack weight about a million pounds. And I usually bring a book with me too. Right now I am sitting on a shaded bench outside of the union, it is pretty hot, so I am trying to stay cool. On my next break, which is a two hour break, I am going to go to the rec and workout. I brought my stuff in my car so I will just change and jet over and HOPE to get an elyptical! Then after that I will probably eat the lunch I packed and then head over to my last class. I am sure it will be easier to fill up my breaks once classes get a little more in depth, but right now I don't have much work to do, so I am pretty bored. 

I am having one of those days where I miss my family. I wish that I could just *POOF* and be over in San Diego. I have been in Tucson for exactly 2 weeks now, but it feels like so much longer. There is a 3 day weekend this weekend and I wish I could drive out there, but they won't let me!!!! YOU GUYS SUCK! Because now I am not going to see them until October for family weekend, which is still like 2 months away. Oh well, I suppose I will live.

XOXO

The beginning of a good year...

My first day of classes started bright and early this morning! I had 3 classes today, and met someone new:) That's always nice. It was a long day for me though. I start at 9 and end at 3, with one 1 hour break and one 2 hour break. I met up with a teammate I haven't seen all summer for lunch, and that was nice. Thankfully I dont have any real serious homework yet. Kristin and I ventured over to the rec around 6:30 and it was packed. We couldn't even get into the weight room where the elypticals are because they said it was "filled to capacity". There was a line of about 20 guys out the door, but they wouldn't let us in because it wouldn't be fair, even though we weren't going to be using the same equipment as the guys. Pretty stupid if you ask me. So instead we ran around campus. Thankfully it was a cloudy rainy day so it wasn't scorching hot! So, now I am back at my apartment, eating a smoothie and really wanting to take a shower:)! Oh, and The Hills is on tonight. YAY!!!

XOXO

Year two...

So, tomorrow my sophomore year of college officially begins. I did some last minute things today, like get a backpack and some other school stuff (so that's what's on my Bursars Mama;)). Other than that I just sat around and stressed about classes. I jotted some things in my planner, printed out my schedule and a map, and got my backpack all packed and ready to go bright and early. I know it is kind of late to realize this, but I found out today from looking at the map and my class locations that my first 3 classes (in a row 9, 10, 11) are on total opposite sides of campus. I go from my parking garage over to the music building (about a 15 minute walk), then from the music building to the steward observatory (about a 10 minute walk), then from the steward observatory to the social sciences building (about a 15 minute walk). I have approximately 10, if not less, minutes to get from one place to the next and I highly doubt I am going to make it. I am the queen of stress and this does not help one bit. Thankfully they are all big lectures so it won't be that noticeable if I am late. I am gonna try not to stress about it. But all in all I am excited for the new school year to start, but very nervous. I know it will be better than last year, no doubt about it.

XOXO

Last Saturday...

... Before school starts. My roommates and I went to the Humane Society today. We looked at the little kitties for Kristin and Yael, and of course the dogs for me:) They were all so cute, but so sad looking, and it made me all depressed to see them. If I could I would take every single one of them home with me. There was a chihuahua mix, her name was Pauline, who was very scruffy looking but who loved me:) I sat by her for a while and let her lick my hand and I scratched her chin. She was wagging her tail like crazy, which made me happy ( And also made me miss my Rocky:(). The few puppies that were there had already been adopted, which is great, but I feel so sorry for all of the more aged dogs that still haven't found a home and probably never will.

This past week the temperature has gotten up to 111. WOW GROSS!!! But today it finally rained!!! I was so happy, I went and stood outside in it. The rain plus the strong wind was definately a nice change for the scorching heat. I could swear the temperature dropped like 20 degrees, but I am probably just exaggerating. 

I looked up all of my class schedules for exams and what not and put them all in my planner, accompanied by bright yellow highlighter. I figure it's a good idea to have them in there so I don't forget them later on. We all know how important it is for me to do well this semester!!! ;)

I miss my family SO much! When I called yesterday they were at the Zoo ( my fave place ever!) watching the nighttime show. JEALOUS! UGH! Unfortunately my Mom's ichat and my ichat won't let us video chat! I am really pissed about this! One of the big reasons my Mom got a MacBook was so that we could video chat, but of course it doesn't work. Wiesners and technological luck don't really go together. Bummer. But hopefully soon it will be fixed and I can see her beautiful face:)

XOXO

Looking up...

Today was a good day:) Thank goodness because I don't know if I could have survived another day like I have been having. The only sucky part... it reached a flaming 110 degrees today!! EWW!!! But other than that, it was fantastic and busy, which is good. I picked up my second roommate, Yael, at the airport in the morning and the rest of the day revolved around getting her everything she needed for the apartment; which happened to be EVERYTHING (she came from chicago, so she couldn't exactly bring the necessities). We went to Bed, Bath, & Beyond and Target, which, by the way, were both absolutely PACKED with U of A student (mostly freshmen and their parents) getting everything they need to be ready for the new year:) It was craziness! We made dinner and ate together while we watched a movie and it was just perfect. I feel like my little family away from family is all complete now and my home away from home actually feels like a home. I am so happy. Tomorrow we are going to go out to dinner and go to a movie as our little " official roommates" party. I can't wait! XOXO. 

Control...

If you know me, you know that I like to have control over situations and what not, and right now I don't feel like I have control and it is making me absolutely insane! I don't know why it bothers me so much, but it does, it undeniably does. I am so upset over it, it's ridiculous. 

Another day...

I am bored out of mind. I haven't even gotten dressed yet and it is about 2:30...that is not a good thing. But as much as I don't want to be sitting home alone doing nothing, I can't get myself to just get up and go do something. Part of that is probably that I don't know what to do. I mean, what REALLY is there to do in Tucson?? Especially when you're all alone. It sucks. I am definately ready for classes to start and for Yael to get here and to see everyone I haven't seen all summer, friends and teammates. It seems like everyone right now is still in summer mode and working, but I think once classes start next week that everyone will be back to school mode and I will actually see people and have something to do. We will see though...

I started another book yesterday that I am almost done with (see, I really have nothing to do). It is called Blue-Eyed Devil, and it is fantastic. I definately recommend it!! I think I will probably go to Barnes and Noble tomorrow and look around for another good book:) I decided it is worth the 30 minute drive to go to the B and N at the Foothills Mall, it is amazing. HUGE and two stories, I would happy to just live in there. Haha. 

Driving to nowhere...

I just went on a long long long drive all around Tucson, by myself. It was surprisingly nice, which is weird because I have been spending a lot of alone time with myself and I am getting kind of sick of it. But I guess I have always liked driving around and looking at stuff when I have nothing else to do. And it was only like 91 degrees so I drove with the windows down:) PLUS... the full moon is absolutely GORGEOUS tonight! I am weird about that kind of stuff. A big yellow moon, or a tall, full, green tree, or a sunset with clouds that makes the sky pink and orange and purple and who knows what color, makes me so happy. I just see it and it puts me in a better mood. I usually call or text Bentley when I see a full moon low in the sky, looking 10 times bigger than normal. I think it's worth walking outside to look at, to appreciate. But... that's just me:) Anywhooo... the main reason I went on my little Tucson adventure was to find  a bookstore that is close to Star Pass (where my apartment is). The Barnes and Nobles that we usually go to is about 20 minutes away, which really sucks cause that's another thing I LOVE to do... go to the bookstore, plop on the floor, and read. So I was hoping to find one a little closer, but no luck. 

Tomorrow I am back on my own again. I think i might head down to campus and spend some time at the rec. It's not like I have anything better to do:) It is probably smart to keep myself busy, if I sit around and do nothing my mind will start going a mile a minute and I will think about things that I don't want to think about, and I will start to miss everyone more than I already miss them, and I just don't want to start that, ya know. 

Peace.

Making it our own...

So, today Kristin and I drove up to Tempe/Phoenix to go to Ikea. We decided to decorate our living room/kitchen in black, white, and red... and we found a lot of cute stuff. We got a rug, some pillows, some little vases for the table, a lamp, and a picture for the wall ( and a wok, of course). It all looks AMAZING together and I wish I could show you guys, but unfortunately my camera is broken... and so is Kristin's, so you'll just have to be patient:) I'll try to get pictures up once we have the whole apartment done and Yael comes with her camera:) 

 

Room...

So this is my room. Well, part of it. On the other side there is a desk and a T.V. and shelves and what not. OH and a huge closet which is VERY nice! 

Also, I just want to put it out there that I am really pissed off over the whole Harry Potter and The Half-Blood Prince movie being moved to premiere in July of 2009 instead of November of 2008. That is just stupid! They think that more people will come to see it if they premiere it in the summer! How dumb! Don't they know that Harry Potter fans will go see the movie NO MATTER WHEN IT PREMIERES!? Now they are just making everyone hate them for making us wait longer! AH I am so annoyed!  

Welcome back...

So, I am back in Tucson again. My Mom and I drove a LONG and BORING 6 hours to get her on Wednesday. Once we got here we spent the rest of the day moving stuff into my new apartment and getting my room set up:) It was exciting but exhausting. Haha. Kristin, one of my roommates, also moved in on Wednesday (our third roommate Yael doesn't move in till the 21st). That night there was a really bad thunder storm that knocked the power out in some parts of Tucson, and kept my Mom and me up ALL night. I think we slept maybe like 3 hours? I don't know, but it sucked. There was one point in the night that the thunder was so loud that it felt like it was right over the apartment and it shook it. It was crazy and it scared the freakin crap out of me! In the morning we took a trip to Target to get some stuff that i needed, then I had to say bye to my Mama. It was sad:( Even though i know that I am gonna see her in a couple months and talk to her on the phone all the time I can't help but cry when I say bye to her because we spend SO much time together, so I don't like it when I am 400 miles away from her and can't just call her up to go to lunch. I know, I know, I am a baby, but whatever. So anyways, once my Mom left I did absolutely nothing. Kristin has work all day during the week, so I am on my own. Actually, I didn't do ABSOLUTELY nothing... I organized my clothes in my closet, I cleaned all of the bowls and tupperware and whatever and put them away, and...yeah, I guess that's all I did. The rest of the day I watched T.V. and slept. It was really boring. I hate being alone, and for a little bit I was worried I was going to fall into one of my well known states of depression from being by myself for so long. Most of you who know me know that I had a hell of a first year of college. It was a disaster and I NEVER want to be that way again. But lets not get into that. When Kristin got home later we went shopping for  apartment stuff and groceries, which turned into an all night adventure, and we didn't end up making dinner till about 9 at night. We made tacos for our first little family meal:) It was fun. We feel like big girls now. Hahahaha. The rest of the night we watched the olympics, and that was pretty much it. Today has been kind of the same. Kristin is at work and I am doing nothing. Yup, very exciting. But hopefully the weekend will be good. We are gonna drive up to Phoenix to go to Ikea and look at decorations for the apartment. That should be fun:)

I will put up pictures of my apartment/room soon so you guys can see how cute it is:) AHHH I am so excited!

Something new...

In the past i have scribbled all of my silly thoughts and the oh so exciting play-by-play of my days in sloppy journals seen only by me, BUT i have decided to change things up and share it with all of you in a blog. I can't promise you anything too exciting, and you will probably get tired of my whining, but no one is forcing you to read this, right:)??

Anyways...

There are definately times when i want to escape from my own life and jump into someone else's, and when I feel like that I usually read (a book, a biography, a blog, whatever I can find that will allow me to escape from my issues). So, feel free to escape into my life if you need a break from your own.

Enjoy:)